You simply are not going to believe this! Yesterday I called Emaar, a huge developer here in Dubai and the one that built the building where we are living. We've been here over a month and have been putting things on a "hit list" that need to be fixed. It's a new building so all the maintenance is under warranty. I called Emaar yesterday.....and you're not gonna believe this!!!
ME: Hi, I was just calling too see if I could get someone out to fix several little things around our flat.
ER (Emaar Rep): Sure, and what is your complaint?
ME: Well, it's really not a complaint. I have a list of some minor things that need to be fixed around our flat.
ER: No problem. And what is your complaint?
ME: Again, it's really not a complaint. Just a few things that need to be fixed.
ER: What are those things?
ME: Well, first, the intercom system is not hooked up yet.
ER: Okay. Is there any other complaint?
ME: Well, I'm really not complaining. But yes, there is something else....as a matter of fact there is a list of some things.
ER: Go on
ME: What? Do you want me to go through the entire list item by item?
ER: Yes.
ME: WOW, there are twelve things on my list.
ER: And what are the complaints?
ME: (To myself: AHHHHHH!) Okay.....here goes.....and I proceeded to go through our list of twelve things.....things like needing a longer screw for one of the handles on the kitchen drawer that keeps coming loose from the too short of screw that is in it now. You get the message -- twelve little no-big-deal things that just need to be fixed!
ER: Hold the line please while I file your complaint.
ME: (To myself: I'M NOT COMPLAINING! I'M MERELY CALLING TO GET A HANDY MAN OVER HERE TO FIX SOME THINGS!!)
Fifteen to Twenty Minutes Elapse.....
ER: Thank you for waiting. I filed your complaint and have a work order number for you.
ME: (To myself: AHHHHHH!) Okay, thank you. What is the work order number?
ER: The work order number for the intercom system is 1356717. The work order number for the kitchen granite is 1356719. The work order number for the kitchen drawer screw is 1356720.....and so forth and so on. She gave me twelve work order numbers for the twelve things on my list.
Still not quite getting it, I said:
ME: So will someone call me to schedule an appointment to come and fix the items on my list?
ER: Yes.
ME: Will someone be calling me today or tomorrow?
ER: Well, for the intercom system someone will call within 48 hours. For the kitchen granite someone will call within three weeks. For the kitchen drawer screw someone will call within four weeks........and so on and so forth.
ME: Are you saying that I will get twelve different people calling me at twelve different times to make twelve different appointments to fix the twelve minor, did I say MINOR, things on my list?
ER: Yes, that is correct. Do you have any other complaints?
ME: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
I'm totally NOT KIDDING! Here, see for yourself:
Pat Pattern, where were you when I needed you? LIG SMILE!
I told you, you weren't going to believe this! And I still don't quite believe it....but I'm sure I will when those twelve repairmen start a calling!!